Finding Enduring Happiness When Faced with Confusion

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By Gilbert Mane, author of 7 Steps to Freedom

There’s so much going on in the world right now. Much of it could drive the most optimistic soul to despair; and, on the other hand, some small shining points of light can be seized upon to keep the home fires of optimism burning. As Shakespeare said: Like a candle set upon an hill, so shines a good deed in a naughty world.

But if we keep swinging from despair to hope and back again, depending on the daily or hourly news cycle, we’ll have, as one my friends put it: “A job with a future!”

So, what should we do to dismount from this pernicious emotional roller coaster? And it is pernicious. Those ups and downs lead to worry, confusion, physical ailments. Depending on the company you keep and the relatives you were blessed with, external events can poison relationships and drive insurmountable wedges between loved ones.

I watched a heartbreaking video on YouTube of a young mother in tears because she had cut herself and her children off from her father, their grandfather, for two years because of political disagreement. She woke up one day and realised what she had done – her father had a cancer diagnosis – she saw that she had jeopardised one of the key loving relationships in her life. And for what?  For politics, that ever changing merry-go-round of ‘in office one day, and out on your ear the next’.

There’s a signpost in that story for those us who want to find joy, courage, certainty, and confidence, in a world of change and anger and despondency. How can we find enduring happiness in the face of confusion? For that young mother it was love. It was that gentlest, and most powerful of emotions. It was something eternal and unchanging and tender – the love of a father and a daughter – that, when remembered, swept aside the bitter, brittle conflict.

I spent many years searching for the answer to exactly that question – how to find peace, serenity, and certainty in a world of turmoil, change and conflict.

As a young fellow I yearned to understand what was really going on with myself and other people. I wanted to know why we did and said things we shouldn’t do or say; and why we didn’t do and say the things we should. Why were we swept away by other people and events. Why couldn’t we hold fast to what we knew to be true and healthful, when others were heading down a path of destruction.

Why couldn’t we ‘keep our head, when all about us were losing theirs and blaming it on us? (Kipling, If)

By great good fortune, in my early 20s, I found myself in the company of teachers and guides who laid out a simple and effective method for developing an awareness of inner strength and peace and stillness; and a way of interacting with people and events that was honest, straight and effective. Which allowed me to immerse myself fully in family, work, religion, leisure, and still keep a clear self-awareness.

I worked for nearly thirty-years as the principal of a very unusual elementary school in Sydney, Australia. We taught the children the basics – Maths, English, Sport, History, Science – but we also included Sanskrit, Latin, Shakespeare, Philosophy, Mindfulness, Scripture, Mozart to the curriculum. 

I loved my job, but it was an opportunity rich environment for being tested daily on the strength my equanimity. Parents, teachers, young children, local government, neighbours – it’s a pretty heady brew for a keen and enthusiastic principal who has to keep all those balls in the air. 

I used to describe my job as one half fireman – I had to see the first whisps of smoke and put out all the fires before they turned into a conflagration; and the other half entertainments officer – I had to keep the staff, parent, and children happy, so the magic and miracle of education could unfold.

It was a great proving ground for the practical application of the wisdom which my teachers and guides had showered upon me. After all, what’s the use of studying the timeless knowledge of ancient and modern saints and sages if, when push comes to shove, you forget their advice and resort to the tired old habitual playbook of fear, insecurity, anger and jealousy. 

For example, the Lord Shri Krishna tells us in the Bhagavad Gita that the wise person is the same ‘in heat and cold, pleasure and pain, honour and dishonour’. 

Sounds simple? It’s actually a pretty high bar. Remaining the same – at peace, inwardly still, detached, radiating love and understanding – when one minute everyone is praising you to the skies for some triumph, and then turning on a dime and shouting at you for some failure? Been there, done that – but no one gave me the T-shirt. What I got instead was plenty of superb opportunities to really practice following the guidance of the wise.

So, want a top tip for implementing practical wisdom and rising above the hurley burley of a confusing world? Do this every day for thirty days:

Sit in a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. Feel your body in the chair, the feet on the floor, and the clothes on your skin, feel the air going in and out of your lungs; see what is in your sight without going off on a string of thoughts; stay in the present moment; smell; taste; then quietly connect with the listening, and let your hearing go out to furthest sound. If your mind goes off, it probably will, come back gently to the body and repeat the process. Do this for about two minutes. Do it twice a day.

I absolutely guarantee, if you stick at it, you will begin to feel more peaceful, calmer, and ’together’. Make this simple exercise part of your daily regime. You don’t skip meals? Or sleep? Don’t skip this.

If you want more, I wrote a book on all of this – 7 Steps to Freedom. Get a copy. You’ll like it.



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